Forgiveness is a difficult concept for you to grasp. You do not feel as if you have truly forgiven because your feelings tell you otherwise. Guilt takes over because your emotions are not lining up with your words. The guilt and condemnation, coupled with the anger over not feeling like you've forgiven, starts the downward spiral, and so it continues.
Think of any other area where you need to get your flesh under control. You tell yourself that you must eat healthier. Instantly, your flesh argues and you give in and indulge. You can stay in guilt and condemnation, or you can command your soul to line up with the new beliefs of honoring Me through taking care of your "temple".
In the same way, when you have forgiven with your will, and your emotions do not line up yet, just remind yourself that you have forgiven out of obedience, and your feelings may take a while to line up with the truth. Do you remember Jesus' words from the cross? "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing."
When you separate your spirit and soul it helps you to see the battle between the two. When you no longer allow your flesh to rule, then your spirit will grow stronger. Pretty soon the battle will not seem so intense because you have trained your flesh to submit.
Psalm 40:11-12 The Message (MSG)
11-12 Now God, don’t hold out on me, don’t hold back your passion. Your love and truth are all that keeps me together. When troubles ganged up on me, a mob of sins past counting, I was so swamped by guilt I couldn’t see my way clear. More guilt in my heart than hair on my head, so heavy the guilt that my heart gave out.
Romans 6:12-13 Living Bible (TLB)
12 Do not let sin control your puny body any longer; do not give in to its sinful desires. 13 Do not let any part of your bodies become tools of wickedness, to be used for sinning; but give yourselves completely to God—every part of you—for you are back from death and you want to be tools in the hands of God, to be used for his good purposes.